| Am I crazy? |
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| Written by Administrator | |
| Thursday, 01 February 2007 | |
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Am I crazy? There is one key thing you must keep in mind when dealing with someone with NPD -- they will NOT change. No matter how many times they cry and beg and plead and threaten, they will not change. They are incapable of changing, because at the very center of the core of their being, they honestly do not believe they have a problem and that everyone else is the problem. They believe that they are above the law, that rules don't apply to them, that they are "better" or "smarter" than the average person. They think they are "special," and that is the ultimate irony because since ALL NPDs think they are "special" they are in fact following a pretty predictable pattern and are not special at all. Can you live long-term with someone with NPD? That's up to you and what you are going through. If you can keep them from running rough-shod over you, it's a decision only you can make. If they are constantly violating your boundaries or worse, abusing you (mentally, verbally, physically, emotionally, sexually) then you need to leave. I would not recommend a long-term live-in relationship with an NPD. If it's a parent or a child, put some physical distance between the two of you so you control how, when, and how long contact takes place. And you can leave the situation when it gets bad. (Not if -- when.) Many people who escape (and that's what it is) a relationship with someone with NPD end up with PTSD as a result of living in a heightened state of siege for so long. It damages or even destroys your ability to trust others, because you begin to wonder if everyone acts like the NPD does. It erodes your confidence and makes you doubt yourself. |
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